In The Lost Lands – Film Review
by Craig Doyle

Director -Paul W.S Anderson
Writers – Constantin Werner, Paul W.S Anderson, George R.R. Martin
Starring – Milla Jovovich, Dave Bautista, Arly Jover, Amara Okereke, Fraser James

George R.R Martin, the creator behind the unprecedented television phenomenon Game of Thrones, quickly became a household name at the peak of the HBO series. His catalogue of fantasy epics translated to epic profits in the eyes of bidding screenwriters, with Constatin Werner purchasing the rights to three Martin short stories, one such story being “In The Lost Lands”. Paul W.S Anderson’s adaptation wastes no time to share its mission statement:

“This is no fairytale”.

A bold, direct-to-camera assertion delivered somewhat ominously by Boyce (Bautista) in the opening seconds of the film, helped detail the lay of the land. Some brief narration described the post-apocalyptic Lost Lands, a world where the remnants of humanity, monsters, and witches alike, reside within a single city, ruled by an ailing Overlord.  With the necessary exposition out of the way, we are introduced to Gray Alys (Jovovich), a witch sentenced to death, being overlooked by The Enforcer (Jover), ensuring the restless slave workers are paying close attention.

Alys’ escape offers our first of many action scenes that populate the 100-minute run-time, evidently placing an emphasis on quantity over quality. Janky camera work and dull grey visuals make the opening action scene hard to follow, a theme which continues throughout. An odd grand wide shot is jammed abruptly in the middle of scenes, in an attempt to distract from the off-putting eye sore which was the entirely CGI set design.

The quick cuts in the action, from extreme close-up to extreme close-up, left much to be desired and felt like a wasted opportunity to explore the witches’ ability to spawn hallucinations in the minds of her foes. The uninspired action, paired with a complete lack of a distinct visual identity, made the screen genuinely difficult to gaze upon.

The successful escape by Alys, brought her into contact with the young and spiteful Queen (Okereke), seeking her aid to give her the gift of becoming a shapeshifter, a task which Alys cannot refuse. Alys, alongside a reluctant Boyce, set out to grant this wish before the looming full moon. The grandiose nature and the epicness associated with this journey is completely lost on the audience, through a shockingly apparent lack of care. Each stop on their journey is almost identical, the same exposition-filled conversation, followed by the same monochromatic, uninspired action sequence, and then on to the next location. There is nothing unique about any of their destinations, each stop becoming increasingly underwhelming. The opening narration depicts a world of magic, monsters, and mayhem, what we’re met with is anything but. There is no effort to build the world around them, the director inserts fantasy elements as if he was forced to.

The story is stretched incredibly thin, the source material obviously not suited for longer-form content, leading to a series of confusing, contrasting plot twists, purely for the shock value. Poor writing plagues this film, causing serious trouble in particular for our leading pair, their dialogue together lacking substance or any chance to develop an interesting on-screen dynamic. Bautista’s comedic abilities are wasted, much of the material here feels derivative of Guardians of the Galaxy. Attempting to apply the same humour to two starkly different characters didn’t work, and the dotted moments of light-heartedness fell flat, disappointing when the audience was in desperate need of a pick-me-up.

None of this should come as a surprise to any viewer, they told us in the opening minute that this film was not a fairytale. Most fairytales have a message, something to say, a reason for existing. The Lost Lands, not only fails to be interesting in any quantifiable measure, it fails to even attempt anything potentially worthwhile. A disappointing waste of what could have been.